Emotional Aspects of Decluttering

Simplifying takes Time and Effort and Emotional Energy

As the journey to Simplifying continues we are moving into the high traffic areas of the home; the kitchen, living and dining room. Rooms that for me have more sentimental items and from what I am feeling more emotional attachments.

Perhaps these things remind me of all the entertaining we have done, meals shared and memories created with family and friends. Some people collect purses, I collect memories. Entertaining is what I do…cooking, creating a mood, making people feel comfortable…and that all involves serving dishes, platters, cups & saucers. Dishes galore! Letting go

We all have stuff, but as life moves on and changes this stuff starts to collect dust and as it outlives its usefulness. It becomes clutter when we keep it purely for the memories not for the functionality.

It takes more than Enthusiasm to let go of the Clutter…

Enthusiasm and a “just do it” attitude may not be enough to help you get through the painful aspects of letting go. This inability to let go can be paralyzing for many people and at times we need to take a deeper look at what is really holding us back.

It goes to those deep dark places where we have to acknowledge that we have made mistakes with large purchase items that we have never used. Having clothing that we have not been able to wear for years because we have not lost those last 10 pounds and having to come to terms with the grief and loss surrounding the death of a loved one. There is always pain as you let go however the pleasure of what is on the other side of that pile of clutter may be just what you need to focus on to keep you going.

As Anthony Robbins, the founder of the coaching movement says, “The truth is that we can learn to condition our minds, bodies, and emotions to link pain or pleasure to whatever we choose. By changing what we link pain and pleasure to, we will instantly change our behaviours”.Tony Robbins

Decluttering…Moving towards Pleasure and away from the Pain

Simply said, once you associate the process of letting go and decluttering with something pleasurable, it will be easier to let go. For example I had to address the pain I was experiencing with selling and leaving our family home and letting go of some (most of) of my grandmothers china. After acknowledging the pain then I needed to find pleasure, I did this by acknowledging that someone else will use Nanny’s china and enjoy it for many years. To be honest it has been collecting dust in the china cabinet for too many years. Also, the excitement of moving to a new home that is ‘right sized’ for our family is also pleasurable for so many reasons.

As you are tackling your own de-cluttering projects and the painful feelings surface, acknowledge them and then ask yourself if these painful feelings are moving you forward or holding you back.

As our family de-clutters to prepare for our new home the excitement of creating new memories is what keeps us all focused on living in the present and looking to the future instead of through the rear view mirror and living in the past.

This article is reprinted from KV Style article of Feb 03,2012

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8 Comments

  1. Great points on the emotional and sentimental value of how clutter can be created. My wife is actually really good at keeping things organized, “a place for everything and everything in it’s place”. She has allowed me to keep 1 drawer that is my mess drawer in my night stand. My pitfall is the “I might need this someday” syndrome that tends to lead to spending a day each month to take one item out at a time and having to make an executive decision to toss it just so that I can keep opening the drawer without it getting jammed! Thanks for sharing!

  2. Thanks for stopping by and sharing. Keep up the great work, really, if you are only spending one day each month to tackle your clutter you are doing great. I like to call them Declutter days. Believe me we all have our one place that gets bad…mine is a room in the basement which I am tackling this weekend. It will probably take me most of the day to clear it out and reorganize. Keep on keepin on!

  3. I opted to offer office organizing rather than home partly because of my difficulty dealing with the emotional aspects of decluttering. People are much less likely to be emotionally attached to files and office supplies than they are to books and household objects, and there was even the odd time I talked a client out of getting rid of something!

  4. I agree paper and books are less emotional that Grammy’s china. I walk a fine line between the residential and corporate business and I know when I am over my head…Thankfully we have experts who deal with these issues nearby. Elaine

  5. This is a great article Elaine.

  6. Thanks Lorraine, I appreciate you stopping by and commenting

  7. Michele Ferrari

    Hi,
    To help with this issues i have started a group with 2 friends, we get together around twice a month to help each other with any cleaning project chosen by the household owner. We alternate house so we all get a chance to have cleaning done. We also love the social part of it.

  8. Sounds like a great idea. Bravo and thanks for sharing